People always say that life is short. That we only have limited time upon this planet to live as we see fit. We are actively encouraged because of the brevity and unpredictability of this thing we call human existence, to never be afraid to do what makes us happy. No matter what anyone else says about it.In essence it is a basic tenement we all strive to live by, even when the world around us doesn't understand why we do the things we do, or knows the simple joy we get from the experience. No matter what the activity is, there are times within our daily lives when people baulk at the passion we have for our sport, music or hobby. And this bemused bewilderment is something I face every time I tell someone that I, a fairly ordinary and well mannered girl, play rugby. So maybe it is time to explain why I do it, defend the seemingly undefendable.
me on a Monday morning......
Now, unless you have lived in some far flung corner of the globe or have been confined to live in a wardrobe for your entire life, you are vaguely familiar with the game of rugby. The most basic description I can offer to the beleaguered masses is this- Two opposing teams of fifteen players beat the s*** out of one another for 80 minutes ,while chasing after an oval, peanut shaped ball around an often insanely muddy field. All in the vain attempt to cross a white line marked by a gigantic 'H' and score the ever elusive TRY!!!!.The game therefore is of course every so ladylike and genteel. And honestly, it is not for the faint of heart or shy retiring types. It is a game of pride, power and bravery, and very definitely not for those who want only individual, selfish glory.
One of my team-mates once said to me , that rugby is the only game that you'll ever be apart of that is like being in the Army. The sense of camaraderie you get from being in a team is very much comparable to the fraternity of a platoon. When you go to battle on the pitch, you don't go to win the war by yourself, but to act for the good of the entire squad. When someone goes to ground, you protect them. When someone makes a breaking run, you follow and support. Not because you want to be the one to score, but because you are there to save their ass if they get in trouble. That's the beauty of the game, because when you get smacked onto your backside, there is always someone there to shield you from the invading opposition. Often it is the squad with the best team effort that wins out in the end over the team that have one or two individuals who try dictate every play. It is the team who cares about the person putting their body on the line for the greater good, that have the tenacity to keep driving forward even when every step they take is a struggle. Rugby is a game of sacrifice and patience, you have to hit as hard as you can until you can barely contain the pain, in the hopes of creating opportunities for your friend to get through the gaps unscathed. In games of rugby, heart wins over talent more times then any other sport. With enough belief in you and your comrades, anything is possible. Two of the greatest games I have ever been apart have only been won by sheer force of will, not slick little side steps and arrogance. Heart carries you through a match where every statistic tells you, you don't have a chance. Heart carries you through to the end even when you're 32 point behind and there's 15 minutes left on the clock. And on both these occasions, heart is what made my team defy the odds and win. Yet we didn't bust our guts chasing the ostensibly unattainable for the sake of our own pride, but solely for the pride of the place we represent.Because the simple principle of it is, when one wins, we all win.
Maybe it is a case of once you are within the fold of being a rugby player/fan, you finally realise the emotive power of this sport. Before that, all it is a demonstration of barbarism at its worst, I mean why would you ever call it entertainment or honourable? And most of all, why as a woman would you compete in such a testosterone injected activity?
The question most often asked of me is why I play such an aggressive, violent sport? I mean other than the distinct advantage that being in a club
requires me to go see the men play too, you know, to be supportive and all :-) As a female player all anyone ever see's are the crunching tackles, the bloody faces or stud mark covered shins, never the bond that forms between you and fourteen other people. When you play a game like this ,the person supporting to your left or the prop driving forward in front of you, become your family. And it is for that family you fight, much like a 21st century tribal war, you bleed and die for the family. They might be Corleones, Scrumpys, Madhatters, Cottagers or whatever moniker you want to put upon yourself, it is for this Mafia family you go to war. They become your best friends, your sisters and surrogate mothers, bonded by something deeper and more primal then something you can ever at times understand. It is almost like being in a wolf pack or a pride of lions ,and while at times as a group you can act violently, on its most basic level it is only for the sake of survival.
Assumptions are made about you when you play this game, that everyone that competes are all of the same ilk, when the truth is something vastly different. The snide remarks about sexual orientation and stereotypes, are quickly silenced when one truly looks at what makes a team. In my experience, it is one of the few sports, particularly club sports, that is open to anyone. It is made up of academics, nurses, lawyers, accountants, office workers, gay, straight and everything else in between. And that is why I love this game, why I continue to let myself get the crap beaten out of me on a Sunday afternoon. Rugby unites the disparate, because everything is left on the field of play and the only people that matter are the ones wearing the same jersey as you. All these stupid labels that society places upon us mean nothing and for those few minutes you are only what you want to be, not how the world wants you to be. When you are running at full force through a line of defenders, bruising every sinew of your body, you don't think about what the hell the other person does in their private life. I mean why would you? In reality it ultimately doesn't ****ing matter! If it doesn't matter to the players, then it sure as hell shouldn't matter to the spectators. So please, enough with the ignorant, immature comments and grow the hell up!
Now it is safe to presume because of my extensive experience, that a lot of people view the game I love as a gross display of unnecessary brutality and borderline sadism. And, you know..... maybe it is? Yet then again, it is not as if the human race is this pacifistic, wholly gentle animal. We have basic impulses and despite the veil of civility we try to mask them under, we are violent by nature. When not at war, history has thought us we can be savage just for entertainment purposes. I mean, Russell Crowe, Oliver Reed,
Gladiator, anyone?!
'Are you not entertained? Is this not why you are here?'
The basic point I want to make is, that the more we try deny the aggression that lies within us all, the more dangerous it becomes. Rugby in a sense is the controlled release of this, a constructive and fun expulsion of all the pent up frustration that builds up from modern life. Just because I'm female doesn't mean I don't at times get the urge to give some idiot an almighty bitch slap to the face when they are being rude! But of course if I did this, I'd end up getting my foolish, impetuous ass sent to prison. Therefore rugby is my anger management therapy :-). In truth when you play, it is like you accept something wild within yourself, tap into the past and see the animal instincts that lie below the surface. An older, more basic form of humanity possibly. It is not any more violent than football when one factors in the hooliganism that accompanies the beautiful game. Answer honestly, when was the last time you heard of a riot breaking out at a rugby game?
This is because, while all bets are off on the field, anything that happens in the game remains on the field and never outside of it. The age old definition remains true, that though rugby is at its core a thugs game, it is always played by gentlemen or in this case ladies.
"Take that you damn vuvuzela!"
I do apologise that this rant on my passion for the oval ball game has gone on longer than it essentially necessary, I do hope you have enjoyed it. I guess my motivation for writing this has stemmed from the continual fight I have had to justify me playing . Many of my friends do not understand why I do it and for many years my mother tried desperately to get me to stop to no avail. I don't know how many conversations I've had where she tried to persuade me to play tag instead. As if!
Maybe now she'll finally stop shooting me those pained looks of slight disapproval :-) Love it or hate it, rugby is a game that demands respect and it is the one game I have ever found that truly is reliant on every member giving it their best. No matter if you're fast, small or in my case, a headless chicken, there is a place for you somewhere. On a rugby field, as long as you play with heart and courage, anything is possible.And that ethos of
'never say die' , is something great to believe in. And for this forward player, I will never stop doing so.
-Forward4Life ;-)
